What do you think of this poem?

Hmmm... maybe you should try including some metaphors, add more visual imagery? its very emotional and real, but sometimes its necessary when writing a poem to go back to it later so you can focus more on the structure and be less swayed by the emotions you felt at the time. Even though I know it is written sincerely, it could come across as affected as things written during a state of depression often do. Usually, I notice that after I've written during a state of depression. Not to say that you don't have great start, and that you don't have a lot to say, but I think you should really let it sit for a while until you can really focus on the formal aspects of it rather than just the emotional, and be able to see it like an outsider would. If you are writing from a depressed mindset, it won't translate very well to non-depressed people. Hopefully that makes some sense.